Glass - 02 Read online

  Praise for Ellen Hopkins’s

  New York Times bestselling books

  Crank

  “Powerful and unsettling.” —Kirkus Reviews

  “The poems are masterpieces of word, shape, and pacing . . . a stunning portrayal of a teen’s loss of direction.” —School Library Journal

  Burned

  “Troubling but beautifully written.” —Booklist

  “Sharp and heartbreaking.” —Kirkus Reviews

  “Once again the author of Crank has masterfully used verse to re-create the yearnings and emotions of a teenage girl trapped in tragic circumstances.” —School Library Journal

  An ALA Best Books for Young Adults nominee

  Impulse

  “A fast, jagged, hypnotic read.” —Kirkus Reviews

  “By book’s end, readers may well feel the effects of each protagonist’s final choice.” —Publishers Weekly

  “Mature fans of the verse format will devour this hefty problem novel.” —School Library Journal

  Glass

  “Spare and intense free verse.” —VOYA

  “Glass is even more terrifying than Crank in its utter hopelessness.” —SLJ

  “Hypnotically sad, with a realistic lack of closure.” —Kirkus Reviews

  Also by Ellen Hopkins

  Crank

  Burned

  Impulse

  Identical

  Tricks

  Coming soon

  Fallout

  MARGARET K. McELDERRY BOOKS

  An imprint of Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing Division

  1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, New York 10020

  www.SimonandSchuster.com

  This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real locales are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2007 by Ellen Hopkins

  All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form.

  MARGARET K. MCELDERRY BOOKS is a trademark of Simon & Schuster, Inc.

  The Simon & Schuster Speakers Bureau can bring authors to your live event. For more information or to book an event, contact the Simon & Schuster Speakers Bureau at

  1-866-248-3049 or visit our website at www.simonspeakers.com.

  Also available in a hardcover edition.

  Book design by Mike Rosamilia

  The text of this book was set in Trade Gothic Condensed.

  Manufactured in the United States of America

  First paperback edition April 2009

  10 9 8 7 6 5

  The Library of Congress has cataloged the hardcover edition as follows:

  Hopkins, Ellen.

  Glass / Ellen Hopkins.—1st ed.

  p. cm.

  Summary: Eighteen-year-old Kristina is determined to manage her crystal meth addiction in order to take care of her newborn son, but when the pull of the drug becomes too strong, her greatest fears are quickly realized.

  ISBN 978-1-4169-4090-6 (hc)

  [1. Methamphetamine—Fiction. 2. Drug abuse—Fiction. 3. Teenagers—Fiction. 4. Novels in verse. 5. Babies—Fiction. 6. Family problems—Fiction.] I. Title.

  PZ7.5.H67 Gla 2007

  [Fic]—dc22

  2007299868

  ISBN 978-1-4169-4091-3 (pbk)

  ISBN 978-1-4391-0652-5 (eBook)

  Glass is dedicated to Orion, Jade, Heaven, and Clyde, whose lives, through no fault of their own, have been forever marked by the monster.

  I would also like to acknowledge my husband, John, whose love has kept me upright.

  Contents

  Walking with the Monster

  You Know My Story

  It Wasn’t a Long Process

  Not the Kind of Trouble

  Before I Continue

  The Funny Thing Was

  My Mom and Stepfather

  T for Today

  I Was a Junior

  So Maybe It Will Come

  I Know

  But Suddenly

  You Have to Remember

  I Call Trent

  Stung

  Not Only That

  She Sounds

  Let’s Find Out

  But First

  I’m Out of Practice

  It’s a Doozer

  I Will Invite Him Too

  Tonight

  Maybe That’s Why

  Now You Might Think

  So Where to Find

  She Makes It So Easy

  But Playing the Odds

  Several Miles Farther West

  Either Way

  Stockton

  I Locate Robyn’s Apartment

  I Watch Him

  Robyn Greets Trey

  Robyn Is Making

  That Idea

  Why Not?

  What I Don’t Really Get

  I Meant to Pick Up a Stash

  I Purposely

  Robyn Decides

  I Start to Leave

  He Wants Me

  It Is a Clear

  Halfway Home I Stop

  I’m Totally in the Wrong

  I Get Home

  All the Way to Stockton

  I Tiptoe Through the Door

  But It’s Saturday

  Mom Leaves for the Gym

  Scott Takes Off to Play Golf

  That Feeling

  My Dad

  I Expect Her to Say

  Mom Is Still Ranting

  Mom Goes to Change Hunter

  It’s Been Almost a Week

  The Garage Calls

  My First Inclination

  She Opened the Door

  We Leave It There for Now

  On the Way Home

  As We Pass the Counter

  Like I Care

  So Why

  I Tuck That Away

  I Pull into Our Driveway

  Luckily

  Mom and Jake Leave

  Eventually

  Leigh Has Put On a Few Pounds

  Truth Is

  Instinct

  Leprechauns

  Then It Dawns on Me

  Oh Yeah, That Bites

  For the Next Few Hours

  Dinner Tonight

  I Won’t Even Try

  But I Have

  It Is Late Friday Afternoon

  Jake Jumps to His Feet

  I Have to Admit

  Okay, That’s Bad

  Except for the Kiss Thing

  Linda Sue

  Dad and Pal

  Okay, Two Ways

  Dad Carries Hunter out the Door

  Dad Drives Off

  Saturday Morning

  The Hallway Conversation

  First I’ve Got To

  But I Can’t Puke

  I Had Hoped

  The Worst Thing Is

  Dad Finally Calls

  Still, Leigh Agreed to Watch Hunter

  All Spiffy

  I Love Him, Too

  In Reno

  Dad Chooses the “Big Three”

  Dad Really Is Lucky

  See, It’s Hard to Tell

  I Don’t Think

  Party Time

  None of That

  Three Weeks and Four Days

  The Question Is Answered

  I Can Hardly

  I Do

  I Grab a Few Dollars

  He Cruises Slowly

  He Finds a Secluded Parking Place

  I Stop

  Twenty Minutes Later

  Not a Wink

  I’m Glad

  We Leave It at That

  The Rest of the Day

  She’ll Want to Knowr />
  I Don’t Care

  We Merge onto the Freeway

  A Little Girl

  We Make the Deal

  After We’re Through

  We Drift for a While

  All Evidence of Our Tryst

  Always, in the Past

  At Least Kevin Won’t Be in Today

  It Being a Holiday

  Livid Doesn’t Cover It

  She May Be Right

  The Freeway Is Deserted

  We Drift Toward Sleep

  I Must Have Dozed Off

  By the Time

  Mom May Be Worried

  They Know I’m Using

  It’s Late Saturday Afternoon

  I’ve Got a Good Idea

  Not Exactly Forgiven

  November Empties

  Today I’m Coming Down

  Help

  It’s Dark

  No More Sleep for Me

  Brad Is Home When I Call

  I Finish My Shift

  On the Way to Red Rock

  Life at Brad’s

  December Twenty-First

  I Cash My Check

  Layaway Picked Up

  It’s Almost Eight

  One Shower

  It Was a Definite Party

  I’m Crawling Home

  Okay, Not Good

  I Sit by the French Doors

  After a While

  Brad Takes Off

  But What About Trey?

  I Guess I Should Call Mom

  I Sit at the Kitchen Table

  By the Time Brad Stomps In

  After Breakfast

  Monday Morning

  Santa Is Coming

  Around Four P.M.

  Snippy?

  Voices

  Halfway to the Door

  We Spend Christmas Eve

  Brad Is Generous

  Especially as He Gently Peels

  Before It’s Possibly Possible

  I Have To

  My First Reaction

  By the Time

  I Keep Waiting

  Chapter Twelve Thirty-Five

  I Do Call Home

  What Is Wrong with Me?

  Turns Out

  When They Finally

  Smoke

  Highlights of the Last Two Weeks

  Every High

  I Haven’t Mentioned the Possibility

  But Lying Here

  In the White Shadow of Morning

  The Door Closes

  A Kiss Falls Softly

  I Still Haven’t Left

  Alone

  One Good Thing

  Brad Is a Little Late Tonight

  The Downside

  Wearing Nothing

  He Doesn’t Answer

  The Problem with Sex

  The Problem with Meth

  Relax

  Part of My Snappish Behavior

  I Know Exactly Two People

  I’ve Tried to Get Over

  We Set Up a Tentative Meet

  Have You Ever Tried

  Sooner Than Later, Brad Follows Through

  He Drops It

  The Roads Are Dry

  That’s What’s on My Mind

  Being Here

  I Leave Without Seeing Mom

  Perfect

  He Wants a Sample

  Too Close for Comfort

  At Least He Didn’t Try

  Wired (Weird) Out of My Tree

  Finally, There’s a Knock

  Long About the Time

  Two Guys, One Bed

  Brad Stirs

  Where Am I?

  His Face

  Brad Has Vacated the Room

  But of Course

  Over a Week

  It’s About Noon

  If You’ve Never

  Unlike Her Apartment

  I Leave

  Easter Sunday

  It’s Gray

  Knocking

  Standing There

  It’s a Short Conversation

  Four Cigarettes

  Just Like That

  All Alone

  No Word from Trey

  We Talk for Half an Hour

  Buzzed

  What Do I Do Now?

  I Sit for a While

  Bright and Early

  Brad Picks Me Up

  Brad Drops Me Off

  I Left My Cell

  Why Am I Not More Excited

  By the Time Trey Knocks

  Waiting for Digestion

  We Seal the Deal

  Clean, Maintenance-Buzzed

  Mom Greets Us

  Surprises Await

  While the Guys Talk

  Halfway Back

  It All Sounded So Easy

  May I Just Say

  The Scariest Thing

  Ultimately, She Agrees

  Baby Makes Three

  Trey Is Gone

  For a Few Days

  Trey Rolls Off Me

  They Say a Picture

  I Am Still by the Window

  Afterward

  I Still Love Trey

  Alive and Throbbing

  The Plan Has Flaws

  Plan B

  One Thing’s for Sure

  The Guy Lives

  Now All I Have to Do

  Who Knew Burglary

  Mom Can’t Have a Clue

  I Locate the Ladies’ Room

  Trey Is Waiting

  Guilty

  Trey Counsels

  I Consider That in the Shower

  If I Want to Fight Them

  When Trey Gets Back

  We Live an Endless

  On a Whim

  First Things First

  But This Time

  Homeless

  Tap-Tap-Tap

  A Second Patrol Car

  Cuffed

  Jail Regulars Will Tell You

  The Officers on Duty

  I Don’t See Trey

  One Option

  Back in Nevada

  Yeah, Yeah

  author’s note

  PUBLISHER'S NOTE

  This ebook is best read at the smallest font setting on your device.

  Walking with the Monster

  Life

  was radical

  right after I met

  the monster.

  Later, life

  became

  harder,

  complicated.

  Ultimately,

  a living

  hell,

  like swimming

  against a riptide,